Thats a long winded title, but in all honesty is there some way to shorten it?

A guy came into the grocery store the other day and wanted me to help him find some items in the pharmacy. I get over there and he says “Laxatives for his kid”. So I’m like OK thats bound to happen, I didn’t want to know the specifics, and in all honesty thats an awkward question to ask “so your kids not pooping, eh?”

There goes all my credibility as a reputable source to go for Pharmacy items in a grocery store. So what if I’m just a checker, i got a reputation yo!

Apparently the only type of laxatives for kids tha age is in suppository form. That sucks, really bad and I should apologize to that kid.

But here in lies the problem. The guy is just a god damn idiot and SHOULD NOT BE PRO-CREATING.

So we’re about to pick some out and he says “he’s teething really bad this should do the trick.”

IDIOT.

You figure someone who makes the decision to have SEX and then to have a CHILD would be smart enough to know what a fucking laxative is, and more importantly what a suppository is. Heres a point to you you fucking ingrate: A laxative is an item that is going to unblock the digestive process SO YOU CAN POOP. A suppository GOES IN THE BUTT.

HOW CAN YOU EVEN GET THESE TWO ITEMS CONFUSED WITH TEETHING? Fuck me silly Sally!!!

So at this point I really wanted to laugh at this guy, but I think it gave away to anger in a matter of seconds because he is raising a child, a child who is going to probably end up like him and in 12 years will be wandering another grocery store looking for Pepto Bismol because his kid has a brutal cut because he dropped him down the stairs while he was doing a gangster lean.

But really the moral of this story is all medical items should come in ointment form, that way theres no pills in butts when something is wrongly diagnosed, just a smooth cooling sensation on ones skin.